Never, EVER kiss and tell.

I stopped writing about what's been bothering me because honestly, what's the point anymore? That and there's no time.

I just wanna talk about this one thing that happened to me. We all know how I injured my knee. What shocked me was when I realized someone was telling another version of what had happened. It sickened me to my bone. To find out that things that happen in primary/ secondary school would happen at uni. I mean this person was having a good time with everyone's attention at my expense. Now I really don't care to much for what people think, I never really did. But this speaks volumes about your character and honestly, how do you sleep at night?

Since I found out, I have let it go, I didn't even confront the person because again, what's the point? I forgive but I don't forget. I'm just turning the other way next time. Especially given this person's track record. This isn't a one off thing. This person is a repast offender. I feel badly for all the people whom you have victimized but I refuse to be a victim.

As for everything else that's been going on, I have come back full circle to a slightly darker place. Only this time, I'm not going to let it get to me like it did before. No more demons, no more playing with fire. I'm just going to continue picking up the pieces and holding on. I have hope this time. It's stupid because this time, it's a lot less intense. Infact this is nothing compared to the beginning of term. This time it's just dealing with the ramifications of what transpired in the earlier weeks plus a little thing or too. That and my knee. Ahh good old knee. I love how my knee didn't give up on me when I needed it the most. Like shifting apartments. Sometimes I can't even believe all the stuff I did with a dislocated kneecap and a piece of loose bone floating around -threatening to poke out of my skin or into my muscle tissue.

The swelling has gone down significantly. Pain wise, there's good days and bad days. I realized that the pain and the sensation never went away. It's always been there. I have just gotten used to it. So used to it sometimes I wonder what I'll feel like after surgery. Sometimes I wonder why this had to happen to me. But I try not to dwell on it too much because that was clearly out of my control.

Parting thoughts: I'm just going to carry on. Because I choose to believe everything will fall into place.

There's. this emptiness I feel right now. It resonates through me originating at my very core. I hope this emptiness can someday be filled. Till then, I'm just going to put a smile on my face when I don't feel like smiling and smile twice as hard when I actually do. Because that's what I do. I'm just going to do what I always tell you to do!

Stay hungry, stay curious and push on!!